Hello. These are some jokes about something that was relevant in 2016/17. Upcoming shows:
Pune (11th January) :
Lower Parel, Mumbai (18th January) :
Instagram:
Performed at: Standup Labs, Khar, Mumbai (31st December 2019)
English lyrics:
Do you guys know that there's a GPS tracker in 2000 rupee note?
But really government has put a GPS tracker in 2000 rupee note.
Now if you put a technology worth 5000 rupees in a 2000 rupee note, obviously, economy will go down.
My point is, if it is true that there is a GPS tracker in 2000 rupee note then if you go and sell it in a junk shop, there's a chance you'll get more than 2000 bucks.
Look I am not against the government. I am just against the 2000 rupee note.
They have made such a stupid note.
Note's colour fades and gets torn everytime.
When 500 rupee note used to get damage, it wasn't that bad.
But when 2000 rupee note gets damaged, my 4 months salary is gone.
I meant to say 4 days...
You would've laughed so hard.
They shouldn't have made 2000 rupee note, they should make a time machine so I can correct the last joke.
But, yeah, very stupid note.
Whenever you have a damaged note in your pocket.
You are scared if someone will accept it or not.
Everyone fears rejection.
But I have one more fear.
When someone gives me a damaged note, I am also scared to reject it.
What if they reject my rejection.
Look I dont remember my lines. I just wrote it in a train. Yeah, this train.
I will tell you how my note got damaged.
I went to an open mic and sat in a front row.
When you sit in a front row at a comedy show at most they will make fun of you.
I went to a magic open mic.
If you dont know at open mics everyone gets 4 minutes.
So a guy came and showed some tricks I was like thats great.
Then he said if anyone has a note here.
I gave him my note.
Then he said that he will tear this note and fix it back to normal.
If he said that before asking for the note I wouldn't have gave him my note.
So he started tearing my note. And when he was halfway there his 4 minutes got over.
He said thats my time. Wlecome your next act..
I was like fix this first.
He said my time is over.
Next guy came I aksed him to fix this.
He said I guess the cards man.
I tried everything to make that note work.
Tried taping that note, I tried something that everyone does when they have a damaged note, I gave the folded note thinking maybe they won't notice.
But people are smart now man they will open to check everything. They also check for transparent Gandhi ji in the note.
He said it's torn. I was like yeah, but very little.
He said what if thats the place where they put the GPS tracker.
GPS tracker's job was to find the 2000 rupee note but for the past 3 years like morons we are trying to find the GPS tracker in 2000 rupee note.
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